Thursday, September 18, 2008

Piss and Moan

Okay, I can't remember the last time I posted twice in one day, but I cannot go to sleep until I get this off of me!

I had such high hopes for today, despite it being Wicked Wednesday (and not in a good way, mind), such visions of glory, lofty get the idea right?

Well, it was a limping disaster. Oh fie!

The ONLY good thing that happened was my discovery of the delights of the Asian-Indian market (NOT Pakistani as I had former--and mistakenly--believed). The shop wasn't fancy, but it was fascinating! Such exotic scents and spices and grains. If I ever need green cardamom pods, a beautiful sari or household Buddha, I know where to go! I did in fact need the cardamom today, as well as whole cloves, and as I didn't want to pay $11 for half a teaspoon, I decided not to get them at Wegman's. Wegman's, you know I love you, truly I do, no one else has that yummy French-Canadian yogurt I could eat like ice cream, but your international foods are overpriced. I got 7 oz of cardamom and whole cloves and I paid, like, $5 for it all! I also got several funny looks while perusing the shelves. It wasn't until I was in the checkout lane and the Indian woman wearing the beautiful sari (I really do think I want one of those) in front of me turned completely around to get a good look at me that I realized I was the only non-Asian person in the store. They must have been wondering what on earth I was doing there!

Once I left the store and my spice buzz wore off, things just went downhill from there. I had decided to make pecan bars for The Viking to share in class tonight. I've never made them before, but they're just like pecan pie in bar form, right? And I make pecan pie twice every year (Thanksgiving and Christmas) because it's The Viking's favorite, right? So it should be a piece of cake, right? Wrong, wrong and more wronger!

Ha! Those stupid bars would not set, not matter how long I fried their little bums. And I had to make a tin foil sling. And I didn't have cooking spray. So I had to butter the tin foil sling. And the whole process just made me want to fling the whole thing on the floor and stamp on it. Then as I'm sliding the stupid pan into the oven I notice that the bars need to cool for two hours before cutting. I was leaving for church in 45 minutes. Great plans for super-wife brownie points dashed to ruins.

So I turned my attention to dinner: the curry and rice, hence the cardamom and cloves. I've made these dishes before, but I guess I'd conveniently forgotten how high-maintenance they are. There's a lot of chopping, dicing and mincing, not to mention stirring and babysitting. Not a good choice for my busiest day of the week, especially when I've already added baking to it.

Long story short, we were 30 minutes late for church, I was a frenzied lunatic of a mess, my kitchen looked even worse, I burned the rice, there wasn't even enough to feed the four of us and I had to leave the bollocky pecan bars at home to bloody cool!

See? Limping. Disaster.

Oh, but there's more.

I got home late, exhausted and sore, looking forward to cutting up a nice, large gooey pecan bar for The Viking. I gently and painstakingly extricated those pesky bars from their aluminum prison. I proudly presented my husband with the ceremonial first piece. I waited until he made the appropriate noises and then happily cut one for myself. I poured a glass of cold milk and dug in...

They were terrible! They were salty! Salt! They tasted like salt! What gives??? There was only a teaspoon of salt in that recipe! I double checked And there wasn't any white sugar in it, so I couldn't have accidentally put salt in by mistake (by the way, Daria did that once when making apple crisp--it was so gaggingly terrible, it was hilarious)! It is going to drive me crazy if I can't figure it out!

There, I think I got it all out. The veg curry was good so I might be able to sleep if I just meditate on that for a while. Yes, I think that's the solution. Veg curry dreams to you all!

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